one of the most common concerns and fears that people ask me when talking about gender is something along the lines of "what if i'm wrong? what if i'm making a mistake?". i think it's a very understandable sentiment, but in this thread i'd like to analyze and address that fear:
firstly, the origin of this fear is rather natural, in that we live in a deeply cisnormative society where trans visibility is fairly lackluster (up until recently, though it still isn't great!) so it makes perfect sense that that someone will feel that they might be making a-
mistake, but as i've talked about in this thread (https://x.com/Juicysteak117/st... being trans isn't an irreversible instant decision. it is for this reason that exploration and trying stuff out is so important, because it's what gives you information. when dealing with something that-
is as subjective as this, you're going to be hard-pressed to sit down and think your way through everything. keep in mind that exploration can be anything! if you've got thoughts of maybe wanting to try out a different name, different pronouns, a different way of presenting, or-
damn near anything that interests you, it's all likely to be good stuff. the fear here is often that these actions are permanent or that others will find out. for the latter, the internet is useful for this in the anonymity it provides, and the former clearly is untrue when you-
think about it! if you change a username on discord for instance, you can just as easily change it back or to something else if you so desire. the crucial aspect of this is recognizing that figuring out what you *don't* want is just as important as figuring out what you *do*.
if you try some stuff out but don't like it, then that's okay! it's okay because you can make some adjustments to it, or worst case you go back to the drawing board now equipped with more information to work with any relevant information here can be helpful if applied correctly!
very little is set in stone unless you choose to set it in stone, because the things in transition that are permanent aren't frontloaded, so generally people are confident long before they make any such decisions. there's likewise often the fear of "what if i detransition?" but-
i see no reason to fear such a question. it's a longer topic than this thread, but generally most people who detransition don't go "oh noooo i was actually Perfectly Cis The Entire Time and have ruined my entire life nooooo!!!" because that's just outright silly lol. typically,-
if someone "detransitions", it's just that somewhere along the way they decided to renegotiate their gender and usually it isn't into something neatly cis-conforming but instead some other messy identity, which is fine! introspecting and learning more about yourself is rarely bad
essentially, it's all a fear that something exterior is forcing the person to wrongfully transition, but that is little more than fiction because gender is self-identified. the only person who controls your gender is you, and you do not have to do anything you find uncomfortable.
lastly, there's fear over labels requiring one to take on responsibilities, or that they have prescriptive weight, but labels are entirely descriptive! picking out a label comes based on your feelings, not the other way around. don't stress about them imo. dms always open to Qs!
@Juicysteak117 Thank you Ms. Tightpussy 💙
