Girls Chase 🏃‍♀️💨

If (as a man, which I am) I had to learn dating from scratch in 2025, here’s what my step-by-step process would be:

1. Find a fashion hair stylist in my area. Book an appointment. Go, and tell the stylist I want a new haircut that is going to fit my face and make me look sexy.

The right sexy/trendy haircut makes your face look completely different (and better). 

2. Start growing my beard out, if I was clean shaven. Buy a beard trimmer and set it at “heavy stubble.” Use a razor to shave my neck clean and clean up stray hairs above my cheek line.

Heavy stubble is the SEXIEST facial hair style to women, bar none. 

3. Start counting calories. Muscle is great, but the really big thing is body fat. If you ate 0 calories, you would lose weight. Find the # between 0 and what you eat now that slims you down while maintaining health.

Slim guys have better-defined jaws + way more energy. 

4. Buy a few nice button down-shirts. Especially red ones. Crimson/burgundy if light skinned, bright red if dark skinned.

Men in formal dress appear higher status &amp; have much higher close rates asking girls out. Women rate men wearing red higher status, more dominant, &amp; sexier. 

5. Start making eye contact with people everywhere I go. Men, women, kids, teenagers, seniors, middle-aged folks. But especially good-looking girls.

Making eye contact with people forces you to be present-focused (thus gets you out of your head) and pulls you into ‘social mode’. 

6. Start socializing with random people around me. Waiting in line, waiting to cross the street, waiting for the bus or train; talk to clerks, cashiers, waitresses, etc.

You flex your social muscles and start to “build up steam” (i.e., social momentum). 

7. Set an exploration + observation goal. 3 new venues or neighborhoods a week, to “check the scene.” I’ll look for: foot traffic, girl hotness, girl availability.

The goal is to find places women YOU like congregate, and aren’t overly closed off (i.e., are approachable).

8. Begin making basic approaches. The most important bits: SMILE, excellent posture, don’t stand too close OR too far, make good (but comfortable) eye contact, &amp; non-monotone voice.

I’d remember to be EXPRESSIVE and to try to make my approaches seem like they “just happened.”

9. Set weekly targeted improvement goals. E.g.:

➡️ “Try this funny line on 3x girls this week.”
➡️ “Attempt a cold read on 3x girls this week.”
➡️ “Ask out 2x girls this week.”

Targeting goals then hitting them advances you + (crucial) MOTIVATES you.

10. Find a wingman (if I could).

He should be someone close to my level (or somewhat above it). Accountability + someone to bounce things off of is a huge help.

I need to make sure we’re both actually approaching women though and not just hanging out when we go out! 

11. Keep exploring, looking for new fave venues. In every city there are a few places where for some reason it is much, MUCH easier to meet girls than other places.

It takes a lot of exploration to find them. The best spot for you won’t always be the best for another guy, too. 

12. Avoid dating apps like the plague until I am getting laid. Dating apps are heavily gamified to addict users &amp; suck up all their attention. They make men self-conscious about looks. They make guys who don’t get results feel bad.

Fine as a supplement, but not when you’re new. 

13. Keep my focus on improvement goals, not insta-success. I’m not going to tell myself “Today I’m gonna go out and get laid!” or “Get a girlfriend today!” as a beginner. It won’t happen & I’ll get depressed.

The focus must be on SMALL, achievable goals, that are within reach of what you can do RIGHT NOW. This keeps you improving, keeps giving you wins, and keeps you on the path toward that ultimate goal (getting laid / getting girlfriends).

Every journey starts with a single step. You have to make all the steps of the journey before you reach the destination. If you give up too soon because “I thought I would take a few steps then be there already” you’ll never make it.

Focus on the steps instead of the destination and you’ll be at the destination before you know it.

14. Finally, look for ways to make it FUN.

✅ Learn new things from the people you talk to.

✅ Make predictions about who will respond what way and see if you’re right (or not! It’s fun to be surprised!).

✅ Try making moves you don’t think girls will go for (“Hey let’s move over there” “Let’s sit here” “How about we go grab a coffee right now?”) and see what happens. Sometimes women will surprise you!

Talking to new people, and especially pretty girls, is supposed to be fun.

If you can get yourself out of your head enough to be in the moment and just focus on what you’re doing in there here and now, it can be for you, too – and that is when the results (better and better results) start rolling in.